Looking Back and Moving Forward

For the past year I have been yearning to go back to school. For financial reasons I was not able to return for the Fall 2014. I was determined to return for the Fall 2015 semester. Ever since I found out that I was eligible for Financial Aid I have been over the moon. I had missed being in school. I missed being at SUNY Ulster. Most of all I want to finish my degree. I want to finish what I had started. My educational life has always been a difficult one. I suffer from Dyslexia and ADHD and was never really given the tools to deal with these disorders. My father, who also had Dyslexia, felt there was nothing in this world more valuable than knowledge. This belief extended way past the classroom. My Dad felt that every day brought a new lesson to learn. My grades may never have reflected my love for learning, but make no mistake I love learning.

The Gift of Learning . . . Priceless

Three years ago my dad passed away after a long battle with Alzheimer’s; a disease that robbed him of the mind he valued so much. My brother and I grew up admiring a man who worked so hard every day of his life so that we would have the opportunities he had to work so hard to obtain. He starting working in a Steel Mill in Baltimore during his teens and worked as a waiter and lifeguard all through college, graduating from both University of Maryland and Johns Hopkins. And went on to be a prominent Eminent Domain Lawyer for the Justice Department and the City of Miami Beach. He loved every minute of it. This was all he wanted for us; find something you love and don’t ever let anything or anyone get in your way of achieving your dream. I know that my life would be different if my dad had not gotten sick when I was so young. I also know that I cannot change what has already happened. I do know that despite how long it may take I will never give up on (his and) my dream of continuing my education and getting that degree.

Day One

So that is what I am doing. I am going back to school, whatever it takes. I will finish my Associates. On Monday, August 24th 2015, I made a promise to myself that this time I will not let anything stop me and I will not crack when things get hard. The days leading up to Monday were definitely nerve-wracking. Like I said I hadn’t been in school in over a year and this time I would be doing it with three jobs at the same time. Being nerves and excited is a common feeling for the first day of school, but once I made it on campus I felt invincible. Every time I walk in to a new class on Monday and Tuesday I felt more comfortable and confident that I could really do this; I could make my dad and myself proud. I have been told that I should reconsider taking five classes, start slow, but with every passing day I feel more empowered and overjoyed to be back that I don’t want to drop a class or two. I don’t want to do less; I want to do more. I want to make up for every opportunity I have ever let pass by me.

Support and Dedication

Going to college is expensive, time consuming and requires dedication. Dedication from the student to be present, attentive, prepared and most importantly read to learn. It takes the dedication of the faculty and staff to help the students succeed. Dedication of friends and family to be supportive and understand. Although it has taken me longer than most to fully commit to school and finishing my degree, this time I’m ready. College does require money, time and dedication, but without a great support system: parents, professors, boyfriend or girlfriend, and friends in general. “No man is an island.” This is especially true for the college student.

We are so fortunate to go to a school where support is everywhere you turn: Trio, Time Square, the learning center, just to name a few. We also have the support of the staff and faculty to go over and beyond to see that we succeed, even when we are ready to call it quits.

Looking Forward

I could have tried to go back to school somewhere else. I decided to come back to SUNY Ulster. The week isn’t over yet, but I can feel the difference already. I am prepared for what is to come and am more confident than ever that this is the right time to go back to school; as well as the right place. I am so fortunate to have the support system I do. I know that this isn’t true for everybody, but find someone, anyone to tell you, “It is okay. You will get through this”. The campus is filled with people who want to help, want to support you in any way they can. I leave you with this never underestimate yourself. Never let anyone underestimate you. Most importantly don’t do it for anybody else, but yourself. That being said I am dedicating this academic year to my dad, a part of my support system that isn’t here anymore), a man who gave me the greatest gift of all curiosity and a love of knowledge.

I wish everybody a great semester and good luck on the coming Academic Year!